He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Text me some of your sweat
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
