ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
