Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Randomize
