Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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