Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Randomize
