just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Randomize