Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Randomize
