Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Randomize
