i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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