I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Randomize
