i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
