Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
