Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize