I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
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