btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize