yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
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