But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize
