i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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