return my video game
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
you never un-have a 4some
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Randomize
