we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
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