Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
