the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
