Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Randomize