CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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