Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Randomize
