But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
