He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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