Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
