Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
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