My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
