Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
