She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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