West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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