i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Randomize
