apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Randomize
