haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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