I need help removing her.
her vagine was all disorganized.
Say something about gay babies.
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
