You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize
