but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
