I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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