I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
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