But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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