My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
