You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
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