drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
