just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Randomize
