exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
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