I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
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