How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
