You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
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