im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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